In our workshop in September, we talked so much about temper tantrums. There was so much information and growth that we decided to extend it for a five week workshop based on the Five Steps to Temper Tantrum Success. The Five Steps is a method of how to handle your child's tantrum in the moment it's happening. The steps are based on how our play therapist, Kellie, works through tantrums with children in session.
Although most believe that tantrums only happen to children, these steps work for kids of all ages! One of the things we discussed at our workshop was that a 'temper tantrum' is most times a result of a need not being met. Regardless of age, there may be times your child has a need that is not being met and the result is an emotional outburst or 'temper tantrum'.
The amazing thing is that these steps truly work. Giving your child space to have their emotions while also placing healthy boundaries on them is one of the most loving things parents can do. Having the whole range of human emotions is so natural. Allowing your child to have that is so beneficial for their growth.
Ready for the steps?
Step #1 Stay Calm: When anger meets anger, there is an explosion. When children are having a temper tantrum, they are experiencing an emotional war inside. By staying calm, you set the tone for the tantrum.
Step#2 Validate Feelings: In the midst of an emotional meltdown, validating your child's feelings allows them to feel seen. It reminds them that they are more than the intense emotions they are experiencing.
Step #3 Set Kind and Firm Limits: Setting kind and firm limits gives your child boundaries on their emotions and redirects what are appropriate and not appropriate ways to behave when experiencing big emotions. More importantly, it empowers them to set limits on their own emotions.
Step #4 Give Options: Now that you've told your child what is not appropriate when they have big emotions, you can give them options of what is appropriate. By giving your child options of what to do with their emotions, they develop healthy coping skills to manage their emotions or use them creatively.
Step #5 Reflect on Tantrum: Reflecting on the tantrum gives your child the opportunity to grow. Reflection allows for your child to become aware of their feelings, thoughts and actions. More importantly, it strengthens the parent-child bond.
Our five week workshop will give parents space to process present time tantrum situations. Our play therapist Kellie will facilitate a group discussion and support through these steps to ensure temper tantrum success.
If you're interested in more information about each step, including specific phrases to say to your child in the moment of a tantrum, leave your e-mail below and you will give the 5 Step Guide delivered right to your inbox!